My Daughter, God and Tap Dancing


Today I had the honor of taking our youngest daughter to her dance class. She has been involved with the class for the past few weeks and my wife needed me to both deliver and pick up our dancing ballerina. I was glad because it gave me the opportunity to watch our daughter practice.

Upon our arrival I sent our daughter to do whatever it is she did to get ready. There were a couple of mothers sitting around and so I sent my daughter off to get dressed not knowing what that really meant or entailed, I only new that I wasn’t going to be any help in that area.

As I joined the waiting moms I began to ask how it all worked. The studio had a window that allowed you to watch the girls as they rehearsed and I noticed it was dark. I asked the ladies if this meant that it was a mirror on their side and they informed me that it was, and that the girls would usually not be able to see those looking in.

The class is an hour and for the first half hour they work on ballet while the second half is focused on tap. I basically was able to experience a combination of Swan Lake followed by River Dance performed by 4, 5, and 6 year-olds.

The watching mothers explained that the girls could see us through the mirror at times if the light was just right and especially when they came near to the glass. I caught my daughter’s eye several times as she realized I was watching behind the mirror and she smiled and waved.

Several things struck me as I watched our daughter twirl and tap her way around the dance floor. I watched with pure joy as I watched her perform. A since of pride came over me as I realized I was experiencing a part of her life, her development, her joy.

I also watched her as she sat on the sideline playing with a friend instead of paying attention to her instructor. A part of me wanted to enter the room and admonish her to behave but the other part of me new that this is not how life worked. My daughter needed to learn to do the right thing because it was the right thing. She needed to learn to listen because it was a sign of respect not because her father had forced her.

As I sat there enjoying my daughter I couldn’t help but think of our Creator. It was one of those beautiful moments as I thought of the pride and emotion that welled up inside of me as I watched my daughter practice and perform, unaware of my gaze. I thought about how often God must look at me the same way. Watching even though I am unaware, loving and longing in His heart, pure joy as I perform my own little river dance.

I thought about the moments when my daughter came near and she could glimpse me through the shadowed mirror and I thought about those times when I have truly glimpsed God. The birth of our children, a time of prayer, a moment during worship. I enjoyed the glimpses with my daughter and I can’t help but think about how much our Father enjoys them as well.

It was somewhat funny because at the end she accused me of not watching because at one point she had looked and could tell I was looking away. She had trouble trusting that I had paid attention to her day. I eventually reenacted her program so that she would know that it was true. Thankfully there are no videos of my performance, the Nutcracker I am not.

At times I accuse our Father of the same and yet on this day I learned something about his gaze. I pray I will hold it near as I dance through this gift of life that He has given.